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In Loving Memory of Grandma
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As September 15th, 2007 looms near, I can’t help but reminisce those days when Amah [meaning ‘grandma’ in hokkien dialect’] was still with us. She had always been a figure in my life, in all my 28 years. Now, she is only a memory. Don’t quite like the ‘life-is –only-temporal’ concept, but guess that is reality. If only we could turn back time…
“The ‘Hollaback Girl” ringing tone on my cell phone, awoke me the morning of 15th September 2006 – just about a year ago. It took awhile before I registered that it is my cell phone going off and not some background music of my dreams. Reached out and grabbed my Sony Ericson from under my pillow, with a quick side glance to my old faithful Swatch - “What??!! 0700hrs??!! Who on earth is calling me at this hour??” My alarm was not set to go off till 0800 (wouldn’t have set such a tune for alarm anywayJ )! Groggily I answered and it was my dad! “Good morning”, he said, in the ‘bubbliest’ tone of voice he could muster and continued with all other pleasantries! They say, it’s the lull before the storm. He certainly did not call to wish me a good morning, he’s a late riser himself – then very slowly he broke the news – “Ah Mah is very ill, and may not live to see the next day. We are taking her home as they (the hospital) cannot do anything much for her” My heart was shattered right at that moment, the feeling of emptiness -felt so, so lost! Ju Mei, my sister, awoke just about the same time as I did, but I reckon she knew what was going on, on the other line.
Phone was pressed against Ah Mah’s fairly large ears, and both Ju Mei and I called out to her. She was unconscious then – but it’s a known fact that, the hearing is the last sense to go! It was a heart rendering moment to hear ourselves saying take care, God bless and love you very much, Amah. It was! After hanging up, there was just that eerie silence, both of us just so lost, not knowing what is coming, going, what to do, where to go and etc. I have never felt so lost. We were in Ekanterinburg – far, far away from ‘civilisation’. Our Moscow bound train was not till the next day and it was going to take 24 hours to chug our way into the city of Moscow! With Amah’s condition, we weren’t going to make it. We have never felt so far from home!
Still in our pjs, we made our way down to our fellow traveling companions, Stew and Do’s room. We just needed someone to talk to, someone to offer advice. After much deliberation, we thought it’s best to play by ear since we really can’t do much about it. Subsequent phone calls from dad were more encouraging ones, telling us how the hospital is going to keep Amah under further observation. Honestly, I then thought Amah was going to live through it and recover – and selfishly I thought, yeah we are going on to St Petersburg!
We went about the usual that day, visiting various places – went to a quaint but muddy town – mixed and mingled with the locals – had vodka, J - oh the warm and fuzzy feeling! Later in the day, we piled into the van and headed back into the city. Some of us were dozing, and then ‘beep’ ‘beep’ a message came through. It was from Hui Mei, my cousin – “Amah passed away peacefully”. Can’t describe in details my feelings – I felt numb. Then dad rang and confirmed. Oh! the brevity of life!
When we arrived back at the guest house we went straight to our room. We appreciated the shoulders lent. Finally decided to fly out of Ekanterinburg –roubles which were meant for shopping, Jumei’s combined, all went into 2 pieces of paper a.k.a air tickets! Doreen and Simon took charge and we practically ‘ran’ through the whole city – Ju Mei and I did the “catching up” job. We were looking for a travel agency – that was about 7pm. After much ado, we finally got our tickets. Russians are neither friendly nor adaptable souls! The series and/or chain of events leading up to our going home couldn’t have been more perfect! That night we had a sing-song, a somber evening. The Siberian 7 (namely, myself, Jumei, Doreen and Stew Sexton, Jesselyn Chua, Megan Gibson & Simon Dawson) had a group photo taken (*see photo – 30/7/2007 below) marking the end of the Ch’ng sisters’ trip. The next day we were on our way back to see Amah – in a box ”
“Life is fleeting fast,
Time bears us away,
Millions more this way have passed,
But none are here to stay”